There is a side to my kink, that while more familiar, is a bit less constant than my masochism.
It's not quite that desire for force that I have whenever I'm playing, or fucking someone.
It sleeps. For a while anyway.
When it wakes up though, it is an unshakable craving. You can see the fire for it in my eyes, yearning for it.
Oh the fun of being a switch.
I'm just as much as, if not then more of a sadist than I am a masochist.
My sadism is where I am most obviously primal. In lieu of toys and tools, I prefer to tear someone apart with my bare hands. To dig my teeth into their flesh until I know they'll wear the marks for weeks. Ripping through their skin until they bleed for me. Devouring them whole, like a monster.
And knowing they put themselves in my hands for this purpose. That they trust their lives to me, knowing I will leave them broken to pieces, bruised, battered, and left in shreds. That they will ask for it. Want me to unleash on them in a way they care barely comprehend coming from me.
Then they come back for more.
And I feel that grin form on my face, knowing that I have someone I can destroy.
It's not at all like my masochism. There is no clearing of my mind. No emptying of stress.
No.
This is just a hunger.
To see them writhe under my hand, and scream as I take them to their limits.
I want to see the panic in their eyes when they realize the satisfaction their pain brings me.
That they are truly vulnerable to me, and at my mercy to let it end only when I am sated.
To see them a quivering mess, not even human anymore, and knowing I did it to them, and they asked me to.
I love every moment of, drinking in their cries, and their fear.
It gives me a high like nothing I've ever experienced.
And sometimes, it's addicting. I never feel quite sated, and will go from one victim to another, craving more from each one.
That's where my masochism can act as an equalizer. Feeling pain hit me knocks me out of the bloodlust I feel, and brings me back to earth.
And so my sadist rests for a while longer, until I feel it's pangs again, and need to feed my craving.
It's not quite that desire for force that I have whenever I'm playing, or fucking someone.
It sleeps. For a while anyway.
When it wakes up though, it is an unshakable craving. You can see the fire for it in my eyes, yearning for it.
Oh the fun of being a switch.
I'm just as much as, if not then more of a sadist than I am a masochist.
My sadism is where I am most obviously primal. In lieu of toys and tools, I prefer to tear someone apart with my bare hands. To dig my teeth into their flesh until I know they'll wear the marks for weeks. Ripping through their skin until they bleed for me. Devouring them whole, like a monster.
And knowing they put themselves in my hands for this purpose. That they trust their lives to me, knowing I will leave them broken to pieces, bruised, battered, and left in shreds. That they will ask for it. Want me to unleash on them in a way they care barely comprehend coming from me.
Then they come back for more.
And I feel that grin form on my face, knowing that I have someone I can destroy.
It's not at all like my masochism. There is no clearing of my mind. No emptying of stress.
No.
This is just a hunger.
To see them writhe under my hand, and scream as I take them to their limits.
I want to see the panic in their eyes when they realize the satisfaction their pain brings me.
That they are truly vulnerable to me, and at my mercy to let it end only when I am sated.
To see them a quivering mess, not even human anymore, and knowing I did it to them, and they asked me to.
I love every moment of, drinking in their cries, and their fear.
It gives me a high like nothing I've ever experienced.
And sometimes, it's addicting. I never feel quite sated, and will go from one victim to another, craving more from each one.
That's where my masochism can act as an equalizer. Feeling pain hit me knocks me out of the bloodlust I feel, and brings me back to earth.
And so my sadist rests for a while longer, until I feel it's pangs again, and need to feed my craving.
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