I was perusing Tumblr the other day, and found a picture of a woman's throat with a piece of string wrapped around it. It struck me with an incredible amount of meaning, and symbolism about the collars we use to define our dynamics.
The string was nothing special. A simple piece of twine, but it got me thinking. It was similar to how some people would tie a string around their finger to remember to do something. Something they look at, and touch, and can keep the idea in their head.
However, in this case it wasn't around the woman's finger. It was at her throat. A vital, and vulnerable area. A part of the body that in the wrong hands, could make us lose our consciousness, cripple, or even kill us.
And we hand that over to someone we trust. Someone who wouldn't harm what we give, but will protect it.
It doesn't matter what is wrapped around a woman's throat. It could be an elaborate silver collar, engraved and delicate, or something as simple as a piece of tied leather thong. The point that it is a reminder, to both people involved.
For the s/-type involved, it shows that they have handed over everything. That they take the risk of trusting someone else with the most vulnerable parts of them. Every time they feel the material rub against their skin, they are brought back to what they have given, and about the protection and comfort they receive in return.
Every time the dommypants side of the dynamic sees the collar, they know what they are protecting. That they have something fragile to their touch. That simply their choice of words could make their partner feel empowered, or completely shattered. Knowing what they've earned the trust to have, and the work they put into it.
And the connection is there whether the collar is worn or not. We cannot simply remove an object, and no longer feel what we do, but that visual and tactile symbol is something that can bring us comfort. It is a reminder of what is there when we all have doubts. Something to make us continue working towards earning that connection that is there, on both sides. Solidifying it, and making a bond that is truly unbreakable.
A collar in no way needs to be obvious. It just needs to be something that the people involved can look at, and know what they have, and how lucky they are to have it.
The string was nothing special. A simple piece of twine, but it got me thinking. It was similar to how some people would tie a string around their finger to remember to do something. Something they look at, and touch, and can keep the idea in their head.
However, in this case it wasn't around the woman's finger. It was at her throat. A vital, and vulnerable area. A part of the body that in the wrong hands, could make us lose our consciousness, cripple, or even kill us.
And we hand that over to someone we trust. Someone who wouldn't harm what we give, but will protect it.
It doesn't matter what is wrapped around a woman's throat. It could be an elaborate silver collar, engraved and delicate, or something as simple as a piece of tied leather thong. The point that it is a reminder, to both people involved.
For the s/-type involved, it shows that they have handed over everything. That they take the risk of trusting someone else with the most vulnerable parts of them. Every time they feel the material rub against their skin, they are brought back to what they have given, and about the protection and comfort they receive in return.
Every time the dommypants side of the dynamic sees the collar, they know what they are protecting. That they have something fragile to their touch. That simply their choice of words could make their partner feel empowered, or completely shattered. Knowing what they've earned the trust to have, and the work they put into it.
And the connection is there whether the collar is worn or not. We cannot simply remove an object, and no longer feel what we do, but that visual and tactile symbol is something that can bring us comfort. It is a reminder of what is there when we all have doubts. Something to make us continue working towards earning that connection that is there, on both sides. Solidifying it, and making a bond that is truly unbreakable.
A collar in no way needs to be obvious. It just needs to be something that the people involved can look at, and know what they have, and how lucky they are to have it.
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