A New Devious Chapter

 When I got home, while Rabbit's now ex had finally moved out, he didn't have a lot of time to process.  I was there for a good few days, and he had work, but he wound up with the full weekend off.  And that first day, at a certain point, I get a message saying that things started to hit.  That suddenly all the change, and the realization of how dark things got, and how much of himself he sacrificed over the last few years. So I gave him patience, and presence, and the understanding of someone who has been in those spaces.  I gave him the space to sit, and process, and get himself past some of the initial hit. And then a few days later, I had something happen.  Something that tore me apart, caused me to spin, and made me feel far more broken than I had in a long time.  I was typing with a handful of people, but knew Rabbit was asleep, so while I sent one message, I didn't expect a response.  He eventually woke up, saw it, and called me.  When I picked up, he asked if I was

 Eventually, I did get home from my weekend with Rabbit, albeit tired and ready for real rest.  Squishy was already home, and so I was getting her caught up on some things.  At one point she asked something about him, and I mentioned that I'm a comfort person for him, and a place of safety and trust, due to the friendship we've built. And she looked at me, then, whether she understood it or not, said "You should be platonic partners". She then went on to say that she doesn't actually understand love, so she just tells all her friends that she platonically loves them.  Which sounded far more like her, but that one moment, had far more wisdom behind it than I think she realized. Mind you, she knows that I'm polyamorous.  She knows that I practice relationship anarchy.  She even knows that I am aromantic.  She's very used to me having a strong connection to people, and showing them care without having to have a romantic relationship, and I think it's help

 One of the things I was concerned with while Rabbit and I were negotiating any sort of play, was where our overlap in interests was.  In particular was that while he says he's a masochist, he's not a fan of heavy impact, and mostly does sensation play. And well, that got me a little worried at first.  I like using force.  I like throwing a heavy beating.  I like getting tired, and leaving someone a bruised up mess.  I was concerned that with some of my favorite things off the table, we wouldn't have enough kinks in common. But then I remembered, I'm not just an impact sadist.  I don't need to bring about excruciating pain to enjoy play.  We talk about suffering a lot in kink, and while I always think of myself as being happy when I bottom for impact, I need to remember that I don't necessarily look for that in others. I also kept in mind that I can be very patient with the creative process, and also have the ability to think out of the box, and make things fun.

I had a long weekend with Rabbit, and so much happened over a few days, that I'm boiling over with things to explore.  This month is probably going to be almost all posts related to it, which means I should have no problem staying caught up over the summer, since I have a lot of adventures planned even without going to camp. But right now, we're going to talk about an important weekend.  Rabbit had his birthday, turned thirty, and his ex finally moved out of the house.  It was an amorphous blend of stress, sleepless nights, surprises, kink, exploration, rediscovery, and unbridled joy.  At the end I went home exhausted, but wishing it could happen again soon. The first night he had work early, but his ex was also supposed to be gone before he left.  We both wound up staying up all night trying to listen for her leaving, and making sure we didn't hear them going into somewhere they shouldn't.  Rabbit and I would do little touch checks while in bed to see if the other was

 So, when Rabbit and I started talking again, he mentioned needing a new rope bottom for getting back into the scene.  I had already been wanting to do more rope after not being tied over the pandemic, so I volunteered.  At the same time, since I know he's a switch, I offered to top within my skillset, which he jumped on. We've since talked about interests, and where things overlap between the two of us, and while I am in general, far more of a sadist than he would normally go for, he's very quickly put himself into a submissive space in regards to me.  It's let me stretch out that switchy part of me that I haven't gotten to in a long time, and with him being in the same boat, had me thinking. He's been rather contentedly conflicted by it, due to having to juggle being around people he holds different roles with.  While I've been in a similar spot, I never had trouble, and he attributed it to my not having a sexual relationship with at least one side, almost