While perusing the Tumblr, I saw something on one of those random little surveys that someone had done. A question that asked if the person had ever cheated on a partner before.
Their response was that they hadn't physically, but they had emotionally.
And this got me thinking about when the gnome accused me of cheating on him emotionally with Felix. After he had been cheating on me with some unknown number people, lied to me constantly, treated me like shit and a myriad of other things.
No, I'm not saying cheating should ever be a justifiable option, but his accusation was based purely off of his own insecurity. He was being an asshole, so he assumed I must be too.
Cheating is a conscious decision. You make the decision to do something, the decision to follow through, and the decision to keep it from others. Drunk isn't an excuse, depressed isn't an excuse, you yourself make the decision to do something you feel you need to keep a secret.
And developing feelings for someone isn't something you can make the decision of whether or not to do. If you hide any trace of a person from your partner, then maybe, but that goes into the decision to keep secrets.
Are you expected to not talk to anyone else? Then you can never develop any attachment or feeling for any other person. To have to rely on one person for all of your interaction, being entirely dependent on them for all your social stimulation? It's a recipe for madness and helps no one. Even worse when one side is allowed to do as they wish, but expect their partner to give up the rest of the world.
Being drawn to someone isn't anything that anyone can help or stop. We create bonds to other people all the time, or go back to others and strengthen the bonds we had later in life as we grow. Having that with a myriad of people isn't cheating, it's having a healthy emotional structure, and taking care of yourself.
Their response was that they hadn't physically, but they had emotionally.
And this got me thinking about when the gnome accused me of cheating on him emotionally with Felix. After he had been cheating on me with some unknown number people, lied to me constantly, treated me like shit and a myriad of other things.
No, I'm not saying cheating should ever be a justifiable option, but his accusation was based purely off of his own insecurity. He was being an asshole, so he assumed I must be too.
Cheating is a conscious decision. You make the decision to do something, the decision to follow through, and the decision to keep it from others. Drunk isn't an excuse, depressed isn't an excuse, you yourself make the decision to do something you feel you need to keep a secret.
And developing feelings for someone isn't something you can make the decision of whether or not to do. If you hide any trace of a person from your partner, then maybe, but that goes into the decision to keep secrets.
Are you expected to not talk to anyone else? Then you can never develop any attachment or feeling for any other person. To have to rely on one person for all of your interaction, being entirely dependent on them for all your social stimulation? It's a recipe for madness and helps no one. Even worse when one side is allowed to do as they wish, but expect their partner to give up the rest of the world.
Being drawn to someone isn't anything that anyone can help or stop. We create bonds to other people all the time, or go back to others and strengthen the bonds we had later in life as we grow. Having that with a myriad of people isn't cheating, it's having a healthy emotional structure, and taking care of yourself.
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