There are many reasons why I do not speak about sexuality, or sex in general with my parents. The following are a few of those reasons.
We have a lot of people in and out of the house normally. It's always been the case, and lately, we've had the family of my brother's childhood best friend (who is basically my adopted brother) here all the time. As an adorable side note, their son who is just younger than the beast, is her best friend. Friendship down generations is the cutest.
So, girlfriend of said adopted brother comes over for dinner a few days a week. She missed one of her normal days, and so we checked in with her, and she said she was at a sex toy party, and would be over that night for leftovers.
When she came over, she and my mother were talking, discussing how she intends to throw a party herself, and wants me to go (which I would rather not, for a multitude of reasons), and that she is throwing the party so that she can get the vibrator she wants, which costs almost $200 (Dear gods am I ever happy I don't jerk off. I so don't want to invest that kind of money in just diddling my bits).
She also talks about how one woman there was prudish during the games, and at one point walked out. She also comments on how this woman is a lesbian.
My mother's immediate response?
"How can you be both a prude, and a lesbian?"
Um, by being human?
Not everyone is comfortable with sexuality. Especially homosexuals, and older ones at that, might be afraid of sexuality in general because of judgement. Maybe they simply don't feel comfortable with pictures of penises all over the place.
Maybe, like me, they have no desire to express their sexuality with people they aren't close to, or attracted to. There are infinite reasons, but absolutely none that mean that orientation must determine one's comfort with sexuality.
They then start talking about how this woman was married twice previously, and is just considering herself a lesbian because she's tired of men, but is honestly bisexual.
And so my mother begins her tirade. About how all people who claim to be bisexual are just confused, desperate for attention, or "are so much of a slut that they will have sex with anything that moves".
At this point I left the room, because I tired of hearing this bullshit from her.
Yes, I do believe there are people who claim to be bisexual for attention. And their is bi-curiosity. There are also people who are genuinely attracted to both genders.
I wanted to look at her, so badly, and say "You know that guy I've been fucking for the last year and a half? The one you have said you like for me, and keep pushing that I'm dating? Yea, we go out and check out boys together. Then we go have sex, because we're attracted to each other."
But that would have made her flip shit, and she would decide she hated him, and didn't want us to be together, because he would undoubtedly cheat on me.
Because, y'know, one has to mean the other.
Once I composed myself I walked back in so I could grab food. They are now discussing how the party has a special sale package in their newest catalog of bondage gear due to 50 shades coming out (just... don't get me started on this).
My mother instantly says she won't be going, because she doesn't want to be around anyone "sick enough to want any of the depravity mentioned in those books".
Cue me grabbing food as quickly as I can, and scooting out of the room. She starts going off about how horrible the things in the book are, like making someone crawl, or binding their hands.
It takes every ounce of strength I have not to either start laughing hysterically, or explain that in a couple weeks I'll be going to a fetish convention with Lux, and Nessa who used to come over every week to dance, and I'll be hurting her, getting the shit beaten out of me, attending classes, looking at lots of pretty things, having a lot of sex, and likely a fair amount of power exchange all weekend.
And this is why I don't talk about any sort of sexuality with my parents. They are openly against so much of my life, and absolutely refuse to believe anything else.
We have a lot of people in and out of the house normally. It's always been the case, and lately, we've had the family of my brother's childhood best friend (who is basically my adopted brother) here all the time. As an adorable side note, their son who is just younger than the beast, is her best friend. Friendship down generations is the cutest.
So, girlfriend of said adopted brother comes over for dinner a few days a week. She missed one of her normal days, and so we checked in with her, and she said she was at a sex toy party, and would be over that night for leftovers.
When she came over, she and my mother were talking, discussing how she intends to throw a party herself, and wants me to go (which I would rather not, for a multitude of reasons), and that she is throwing the party so that she can get the vibrator she wants, which costs almost $200 (Dear gods am I ever happy I don't jerk off. I so don't want to invest that kind of money in just diddling my bits).
She also talks about how one woman there was prudish during the games, and at one point walked out. She also comments on how this woman is a lesbian.
My mother's immediate response?
"How can you be both a prude, and a lesbian?"
Um, by being human?
Not everyone is comfortable with sexuality. Especially homosexuals, and older ones at that, might be afraid of sexuality in general because of judgement. Maybe they simply don't feel comfortable with pictures of penises all over the place.
Maybe, like me, they have no desire to express their sexuality with people they aren't close to, or attracted to. There are infinite reasons, but absolutely none that mean that orientation must determine one's comfort with sexuality.
They then start talking about how this woman was married twice previously, and is just considering herself a lesbian because she's tired of men, but is honestly bisexual.
And so my mother begins her tirade. About how all people who claim to be bisexual are just confused, desperate for attention, or "are so much of a slut that they will have sex with anything that moves".
At this point I left the room, because I tired of hearing this bullshit from her.
Yes, I do believe there are people who claim to be bisexual for attention. And their is bi-curiosity. There are also people who are genuinely attracted to both genders.
I wanted to look at her, so badly, and say "You know that guy I've been fucking for the last year and a half? The one you have said you like for me, and keep pushing that I'm dating? Yea, we go out and check out boys together. Then we go have sex, because we're attracted to each other."
But that would have made her flip shit, and she would decide she hated him, and didn't want us to be together, because he would undoubtedly cheat on me.
Because, y'know, one has to mean the other.
Once I composed myself I walked back in so I could grab food. They are now discussing how the party has a special sale package in their newest catalog of bondage gear due to 50 shades coming out (just... don't get me started on this).
My mother instantly says she won't be going, because she doesn't want to be around anyone "sick enough to want any of the depravity mentioned in those books".
Cue me grabbing food as quickly as I can, and scooting out of the room. She starts going off about how horrible the things in the book are, like making someone crawl, or binding their hands.
It takes every ounce of strength I have not to either start laughing hysterically, or explain that in a couple weeks I'll be going to a fetish convention with Lux, and Nessa who used to come over every week to dance, and I'll be hurting her, getting the shit beaten out of me, attending classes, looking at lots of pretty things, having a lot of sex, and likely a fair amount of power exchange all weekend.
And this is why I don't talk about any sort of sexuality with my parents. They are openly against so much of my life, and absolutely refuse to believe anything else.
Man, that's hard.
ReplyDeleteI don't discuss my sexuality with my parents because of awkwardness, but they're pretty open-minded. My mom has said some similar things about bisexuals (they're just confused; pick one), but other than that, she keeps an open mind.
Im sure that would be true until she heard about my lifestyle, so she doesn't need to know.
50 shades makes things really awkward as people talk about it all the time and some of the things said just makes me so.... guhhh.
When people talk about 50 shades, I usually just listen to their views on it, as it's hard to try and sound like I don't involve myself in the lifestyle I do when responding. Most of the people though, take it as porn, and talk about it as though it is, and that's fine. Porn and fantasy and all is wonderful, and bad writing can sometimes be excused as an attempt to write while jerking off.
DeleteWhat I don't like is when people talk about it like it's some enlightening resource of how they want their lives to become.
It is porn. Do you really want the plumber to come inside and fuck you and then leave without fixing your shower? No. Have a happy time imagining a cute person plowing you while you jerk off, then go back to real life.
Or, you know, become educated on what things should be if the fantasy really inspires you to look further.