Not a Whole

 For a while, I was trying to keep up with a side instagram.  I was posting there regularly, and it started gaining traction in some ways.  Apparently enough so that people started sending me messages. 

Wound up proving to me why I need to keep everything in my life just a little separate, because people who aren't worth it definitely won't do the work.

Randomly, a guy started sending me dms, and it was quite obvious that he was trying to pick me up.  I tried to steer the conversation to keep it professional and polite, while making sure to still be honest how I could.  After a few exchanges, I mentioned having a partner, and never got a response.  Completely ghosted with a single word.

And while I wanted him to go away, because he was trying to pick me up without knowing anything about me, it pissed me off that he behaved that way.

As soon as I had a partner, I didn't exist.  I wasn't worth anything, and he couldn't even apologize for trying to pick me up.  He couldn't tie up the conversation in a polite way, or entertain the possibility of actually seeing if there was any sort of connection worth pursuing.  

I was trying to obviously show that I wasn't interested, without just shutting him down so that I could remain professional.  I also didn't want to deal with how he may react if I was explicit in turning him down.  However, it took me mentioning having an attachment to another person to let him get the hint.  I was an already claimed product, and not a person in my own right.  Without asking anything, he acted like I was someone else's property, and he was about to set off the security alarms.

And I mean, I am someone's property, but in a very different way than he was thinking.

Things like this make me feel less inclined to look for additional partners.  How I won't be seen as a person by so many, and tossed aside when people find out that I have a partner, regardless of the fact that I'm polyamorous, and capable of having multiple relationships.

If we actually treat people like complete beings, I bet we'd all do a whole lot better.