Needed Time

After the blow up my father had, I was honestly in a bit of an unhealthy space.  I didn't feel safe in my own home, and my mother was also frustrated with him over trying to make plans to travel.  She was ready to drop the possibility of a trip altogether, because he was fixated on doing one specific thing, which she didn't really want to do.

Surprise, they did what he wanted anyway, but they were gone for a handful of days, which gave me a break from them, and allowed me to actually feel like I had my own space, in some ways.  Oliver and I managed perfectly well together, and in many ways my mind used it as a way to force a self care break of just not doing for a few days.

Lux also visited, and we spent more time together without doing anything in particular than we'd had in almost two years.  Because of the pandemic, we'd only had shorter visits with each other, so it was good to have time when as soon as I saw him, I wasn't already concerned with when he would leave again.

We didn't really do anything in particular with the time.  We were just together, and talked about some things, had a bunch of sex, and just enjoyed sharing space.  We were silly, and relaxed, and caught up, and did all those things that we should do more of.

We also made plans for me to head down and visit him just after our birthdays, which I still need to figure things out for now.

The day that Squishy came home, I had my class on returning to events.  It was my first time doing a lecture during the pandemic, and it was weird.  I was a ball of nerves, but the class went well, and definitely made me want to get back to teaching more.  I've been thinking about doing more regular donation based classes and discussions, and wondering if it would do well.

For many things, I'm feeling a little more recharged.  I'm ready to start taking more things on, have my hands in more things, and create.