Simple Box

Puttering around before bed the other night, I saw an article about helping women have a higher sex drive to meet their partner, or some such.

While I don't agree with that being necessary, and that anyone should be able to find someone they feel connected with, as well as have a similar sex drive, I let curiosity take over, and click.

And, it gives the stereotypical advice.  Learn to masturbate.  Buy lingerie.  Create a romantic mood for yourself.

When I was younger, and had no idea what a desire for sex actually felt like (for a host of reasons), this was the same sort of thing I was told.  And, I think this limited pool of advice definitely contributed to me being awkward as hell for the longest time when it came to sex.  I felt like I was broken because all the things recommended made me feel worse, or bored, or uncomfortable in my skin.  It took me a long time to realize and acknowledge my sex drive, and that it is as high as it is.  And it had nothing to do with what everything suggested.

I wore what made me feel like me.

I celebrated me for who I am.

I was with people who actively showed desire toward me, and made me feel secure.

I made sure to think about sex as something that doesn't need a certain appearance or setting.

The more comfortable you become with yourself, and the more supportive your partner is (should you have one) the more you will flourish, and it doesn't involve sticking to a cookie cutter solution.