Reaching an End

 There are very few things I am patient with, although I have gotten better as I've gotten older.  One thing I am often patient with though, is my partners.  I may grump around with things that are irritating, but I am very quick to appreciate the good first, and put those annoying moments aside in order to enjoy the overall time with a partner.

However, when things turn into consistent disrespectful behaviors, lack of change when talking about issues, and there's no positive actions or moments to balance it out, I'm not going to just sit and take it like I should be fine with what's going on.

And Kitty, after how long I've cared about him, and tried to keep some level of connection, I've hit a point where I can't try and spin his behaviors to any perspective that looks like he cares at all.  I've been left ignored, lied to, feeling manipulated and disrespected.  What's worse, is where I was done with him months ago due to the imbalance of good and bad, I was hoping to cut things off when it was at a point of growing apart, and nothing too horrible overall.  As time has gone on though, more and more has come about that I've found from things going on around me, which has made it to where I don't even know if I can be friends with him anymore.

I think about how he acted when he claims he was an asshole, and honestly he was far more respectful then.  He's learned to simply add what's supposed to be healthy language to shit behavior, and justify to himself that it makes everything ok.  I don't even want to talk things out with him anymore, because any time I've brought something to him, I get a curated answer with nothing to back it up in return.

I've told Pyre about it all, because she's his partner still, and she needs to be aware of the things he's finding as acceptable behavior.  If he's doing them to me, chances are he's doing something shaped similar to others, and they need to looking for it.  If he isn't though, and this is how he thinks it's ok to treat just me after this long, then I should have dropped his ass sooner, and my joke about a baseball bat that I threw at Lux becomes far less of a joke.