Yet another one of those wonderful side effects of the holidays is something I've been seeing a lot of lately. How we feel alone over this time of year, and have that obligation and craving for some sort of companionship. The season that creates that need for presence, especially in those may be unpartnered, whether out of familial pressure, or simple social expectation.
And because we as a society do not encourage acknowledging the bonds of friends, or non-romantic connections in our lives, many many people tend to look toward the people of their past for companionship this time of year.
Unfortunately, in many cases, it means people reconnecting with those who had previously proved themselves to be toxic. But because loneliness is so digging for many people, they still go back to them, and cling to the bits of attention they get.
And yes, seeing that written makes it look like such a silly and dumb idea, but it's incredibly common. We don't create a situation that helps people appreciate independence or platonic love. In fact, doing these things are frowned upon, and cause dismay and pressure from all manner of outside sources. To avoid that, people will cling to whatever they can get, and wind up making the same mistakes over again.
It encourages insecurity, honestly.
Something that I'm glad I've had to learn is security in myself, and an appreciation of my own independence, and that I can enjoy my own weird people and the weird places they have in my world. It's been something I've had to learn the hard way several times, but those toxic mistakes don't even get considered as something to repeat now.
And because we as a society do not encourage acknowledging the bonds of friends, or non-romantic connections in our lives, many many people tend to look toward the people of their past for companionship this time of year.
Unfortunately, in many cases, it means people reconnecting with those who had previously proved themselves to be toxic. But because loneliness is so digging for many people, they still go back to them, and cling to the bits of attention they get.
And yes, seeing that written makes it look like such a silly and dumb idea, but it's incredibly common. We don't create a situation that helps people appreciate independence or platonic love. In fact, doing these things are frowned upon, and cause dismay and pressure from all manner of outside sources. To avoid that, people will cling to whatever they can get, and wind up making the same mistakes over again.
It encourages insecurity, honestly.
Something that I'm glad I've had to learn is security in myself, and an appreciation of my own independence, and that I can enjoy my own weird people and the weird places they have in my world. It's been something I've had to learn the hard way several times, but those toxic mistakes don't even get considered as something to repeat now.
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