It's been a year since I wrote that letter to Kitty. A year to process losing one of the few people in my life that I've ever called my best friend. Losing someone who was a rock of mine for so long, and seeing him disappear. And that was the hardest part of it in many ways. There wasn't something where we grew apart while having contact. There was just that disappearance on his end (on top of other things) that made it so hard.
And with having dealt with that for so long, as well as the silence after the letter (as I still haven't heard a word from him since Oct2020) it's apparently left its own obstacles for me.
While I'm still incredibly patient with the important people in my life, and don't need a lot in the scale of things, I'm learning that little reassurances mean a lot. Especially for the people I don't get to share space with often, little things like sending a link or a gif can be entirely comforting. Sometimes though, I do still just need words.
Not a ton of words, but simple things. Saying that you want to find time together, you miss me, or just that I'm important can seriously have a positive impact on my wellbeing. It provides a deep relief that nothing is disappearing, and they're still there. People change, things change, but people simply being there, is more than enough for me. I can adapt to a lot, so long as I have something to go on.
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