I've spoken here previously about how little I need from partners. In general, I need presence, basic respect, and consistency from words to actions.
And, well, those are true, but apparently there's more to it than that. Which of course, because it's me, I had to learn the hard way.
I need a little more than just basic consistency. That's important of course, but I need a bit more assurance than that. Much like the small gestures of care I often talk about, and how much they mean to me, I need little physical gestures of attention to express affection, care, and desire.
It's something that took a lot of self exploration, but I've figured it out.
And, honestly, as much as I hate asking for anything, so even acknowledging that as a need is hard, is helpful to me. I can think back to many times when a partner had shown heavy attention to others, and given me none to balance things out, and feeling hurt and almost abandoned.
And I know that this is a small thing. It's not a big thing to ask to make sure I get smooches and my butt grabbed or little comments. It's something that just requires a bit of mindfulness, and a moment of time.
It sucks that even asking for something that small is hard, but hard things are necessary, and these are things that will help me so much to know about from now on.
And, well, those are true, but apparently there's more to it than that. Which of course, because it's me, I had to learn the hard way.
I need a little more than just basic consistency. That's important of course, but I need a bit more assurance than that. Much like the small gestures of care I often talk about, and how much they mean to me, I need little physical gestures of attention to express affection, care, and desire.
It's something that took a lot of self exploration, but I've figured it out.
And, honestly, as much as I hate asking for anything, so even acknowledging that as a need is hard, is helpful to me. I can think back to many times when a partner had shown heavy attention to others, and given me none to balance things out, and feeling hurt and almost abandoned.
And I know that this is a small thing. It's not a big thing to ask to make sure I get smooches and my butt grabbed or little comments. It's something that just requires a bit of mindfulness, and a moment of time.
It sucks that even asking for something that small is hard, but hard things are necessary, and these are things that will help me so much to know about from now on.
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